2009年6月7日 下午3点整

等也等到这个时刻... 等也等到妈的声音，他才安心的离开...

a whole lot of events happened these two days. received a call in the morning on saturday telling us be prepared to rush up and for the worst, and telling us to wait for their call. we are still deciding to change the ticket. but its too last minute... 24 hours to go...

but before that, i was sleeping and had a dream. bad premonition but it was so real. i cried in the dream and when i wake up im still crying. about something, so real, which i don wish to enclose it here.

mum didnt had appetite to eat. but we needed our dinner so we headed down for dinner. realised that we forgot to buy fruits cuz it's 15th day of month. i reminded my mum earlier on but i just donno why she didnt realise and she didnt hear me. as we walked down to ntuc, passing by the hard court down a little rock pavement. mum lost her balance and fell. injured both of her legs, bleeding, and sprained her right ankle which she had bad injuries before. we went ahead to buy some medication cuz we had a prediction that we need to leave immediately.

we searched frantically online for the train tickets. but to no avail all train tickets are sold out due to the peak holiday season. there is but only one ticket left for the shortest possible time that we could find. however, i kinda fed up with that online booking system. not to the fact that we couldnt book tomorrow's train tix on just today, but it's just... can they come up with a more user friendly system to select the date and so on? why show us february 2006 when it's now already 2009? online booking needs to be done 2 days in prior. we found a sunday morning train but theres only one seat. and i simply couldnt press that seat. then we found a sunday night train. its first class deluxe which costs us $250. i've already clicked on it and got ready to pay but bla bla bla, and so i pressed a NO button. so the seats got locked, and waited for 30 mins or so although the system said if not received the payment from the bank the seats will be automatically de-allocated by the system within 10 mins... and i click and i click. finally it's unlocked. then we found another transport way. which is taking a bus in the morning. i searched and what a sigh of relief that i've successfully booked 2 seats online. which only costs us $70... that was 12 midnight...

we hurried to pack our stuff and race with time. the whole bus ride was fine but the only 3 things i did on the bus was: sleep, listen to mp3 and most imptly, trying to 憋尿. the bus didnt stop for a toilet break or so throughout the ride. my mum and i started to look out for all the green road signs which says toilet stop and how many metres... we finally saw one but the driver didnt stop!!! i had really no choice but to request for a break. i was wondering? do the people on the bus need a toilet break? or did they have really elastic bladders? finally theres a stop, i rushed down to the toilet and dashed past the road when another coach is horning at me, fortunately it was moving slow. wa that was really dangerous. then in the toilet... long queue man... 2 out of 6 toilets spoilt. D*** it. i was about to chiong to the male toilet soon. but i 忍! this was worse than last time. after the whole thing... i was finally relieved! now.. i can sleep nicely. but got awoken by several calls from my father, asking us where are we and so on... i guess something not quite right happened.

enough of that whole bus ride. the bus could have moved faster. as soon as we reached the bus stop. we went up to the hospital and so... as soon as my mum got up. called him. and.....

泪流满面。。 每个人都在场，但我没开口叫一声，只能眼睁睁看着平面上的心跳号码一直降落，减十，再减十。。。慢慢的，没了。。。我站在那，愣着了。只能安安静静的哭着。。。

妈妈一定会照顾外婆的。。。

i soon got back to this 'home'... caught up with kaka as she's leaving for indonesia. cant help it but such a wrong time of flight... really wrong time. then i walked into the house, no choice but to put on a lie to grandma that... mum is away to buy things.

my aunt was crying badly, she couldnt go cuz she was feeling well, sprained her leg or wadsoever. i talked to her... then. as soon as i got down . the mother and son are quarrelling over some matters. so scary can? i was so shocked inside of me... some discontentment within me but...