Calculus paper today has made my heart, my brain, my bladder, my hand, and my eyes EXPLODE!!!

It's like, abnormal questions. I anyhow write... haha! something enlighten me in the last ten minutes. But hai, no time to complete it. Well, I think my approach is correct I hope.

ARHHH!! I am so stressed now... I cannot finish all that what is needed for tomorrow.

Good luck to everyone taking exams!

Somehow, my clock says 9 Dec now. But I still don't feel a sense of urgency, at all! And I have been increasing my TV time these days. Watching 3 dramas while studying at the same time. Maybe I have been studying for the past few days that I don't have a sense of feeling anymore? It's just within 24 hours away from my paper. First paper, booboo LA. my weakest topic. But after I did some calculations practice and notes. I feel quite okay. I could have just understood more just that I am slow. 4 AUs =(

I still have many revisions yet to complete. Especially with the paper after LA, that's my most confident HP102 but the exam format doesn't really sound right with like definitions tested according to the prof. I hope I have more time to revise soon. I have been neglecting Malay and the most being abandoned of all is Calculus.

Looks like time management is important here.

The 9pm new Channel 8 big show just now was so scary and terrifying in the beginning. And I watched it because I know there are curtains in the show made by my mother. HAHA! What a reason. The theme song was nice sang by Jeff Zhang.

In just an hour, 8 people died.

But in the last part of that hour, the Elvin Ng is soooo funny to the max can!!!???!! Go watch the last 10 minutes of the show. So hilarious.

But that will be my motivation to watch that show maybe? Because that's too violent and I don't think it's suitable for children to watch.

However, if people complain that Singapore show's are too boring bla bla bla... and on the other hand, they complain such shows are too violent bla bla bla... then Singapore mediacorp will not have the chance to improve! I think they are taking big steps to venture out. Which I think it's good. I can really see more better shows coming up. And I'm glad...

You are what you let yourself to be and what you believed yourself to be like. If you think you can do it, means you can do it. If you think you are stupid, then you are stupid. Right?

Oh I haven't blog about my malay oral which made my heart pound and race til the night. I am so nervous in front of the teacher and I didn't know how to answer questions. I hope I can still score not too badly provided that I have somehow talked alot in my essay. And I was rushing through 215 assignment which makes me dislike math assignments anymore. Assignments may not be a good thing than tests because at least, tests come out questions that you will know how to do from the lectures and books. But assignments tend to me something taken from fantasy or the unknown reality. I almost cried when I cannot do the 110 assignment previously. And I wanted to cry because I cannot finish the 215 assignment in time for bed.

YAY project is coming to an end and I still kind of feel bad about not going for project discussion. Such things always happen to me in favour of being irresponsible. Well, why do I always have projects in my semester? Next sem, have again...

I cannot really study well today. Distractions. thoughts. Hunger. and TV! Sometime I could have just imagined myself in another environment and cried for no reason. A few days left to the battle. I will fight with myself and noone else. I am strongly motivated to outshine myself and nobody else.

I seriously don't understand why we have to rush assignments, lab problems, reports, project in the last week of semester when everyone else is busy studying already. I dislike this kind of feeling totally, when the date is near, but you just haven't complete it. And I really don't see the need of everyone coming together and compile everything together, when there isn't much ideas to propose already. Can I just chop chop and get done over with this kind of rubbish? For once, I'm just very individualistic. Commitment is a big issue.

6 Dec 12 noon faster come and that will be the time I know there will be no more burden except for studies.

Everywhere I go today, people from my course are rushing here and there for their lab marks, looking anxiously everywhere for the tutor, at the same time rushing for assignments yet to be completed. Can't we just have the privilege of a nice last day in Sem 1? I seriously feel quite inferior to these kind of environment. Well, I'm fortunate of not being together with the chaotic bunch asking for lab marks, and not those who are frantically rushing to complete the assignment, though I sacrifice my sleep yesterday to finish til 3 am.

I am in a very bad mood today. Though nobody caused me to be in a frustration mood.

I woke up crying in the middle of the night, this symptom signals me that I am in a stressed up mood. Trying very hard to catch up my linear algebra and prob and stats. For the fact that everyone around me is doing so well, and that I have high expectations of myself lately, but I'm trying to lower it. People are just too competitive and greedy. I am worried I couldn't even maintain a second upper. I had a bad dream. So I cried and weap my tears. yes, in the midnight, for no reason. Weird.

It may be because I had so many things to do this week which supposed to be studying for the finals now. Malay oral, hp102 project, mas 215 assignment, mas 213 lab assignment.
I reached quite in time for my lab today, as I dropped off at hall 1 and took a C bus ride to spms. First frustration: Then, when I came in, this person, somebody who I knew from somebody, apparently, took my feng shui place, and apparently, he HOG TWO SEATS somemore during a formal lesson IN THE LAB when other students are trying to finish their stuff. 竟敢在本小妹子的地方撒野 ！！！ Though I understand that there are not so many people in the lab, but I just feel like telling him, "Can you please leave?" When I purposely sat beside him. I know this person didn't offend me or something, but that's something that offend my privacy and my territory.

I just faster leave the lab upon showing my answers, and thank goodness the tutor help me solve something in my labcode. What a frustated place...

I went to study and ate my lunch, have been craving for Western food and spaghetti sometime. But the chicken chop fats got stuck into my teeth, so irritating feeling. I kept going into the toilet and even bought a pear to chew see if it comes out. I studied for hp102 awhile, but, second frustation: I am just feeling so sleepy and worn out.

After my lesson, waited for a while before I went in for the track selection talk. Nothing much though, they are just things I have known from the website.

Can I just take a break and concentrate on my studies?