Stop putting me through decisions!

Las Vegas? Yes? No?

NO!

So sad right?

When I get distracted, I will stop doing other things and keep thinking about it.

This afternoon I was overwhelmed, once again, with the decision of going to the states. Yes again. Last week it was Florida, this week it was Las Vegas. I was actually more tempted with Florida, going with people I am not close with. But now, it's Las Vegas! A place where I wanted to go so badly last month but completely given up this month. I guess what I really want out of travel is that, I want to make it worth it. Not just paying alot for air tickets and accommodation. I was more inclined to explore more Canada places than the States because I would really love to come back again with my parents, visiting my Uncle and some other nearby places, like the canyon, LV, and California. Having stayed here in Canada for close to a month, I feel that, what I really like is scenery, enjoying something of their nature. As for shopping, eating buffet, and playing casino (Well, I can do that next time), I would rather give it a miss. Those are activities I can do anytime, no need to go LV to do that. But ya, I would enjoy the lights and the shows. I mean, I rather go somewhere that is super exclusive. You may think that I am very stingy, since I'm already here. However, I really think that, from London, travelling to other places is seriously very expensive. I know my father is upset with me going here and there... and I seriously don't know that he doesn't know I'm flying off with two other guys when I left. Maybe my mum helped me keep alot of secrets. Well, the problem with going out of your own comfort zone.

At this age, many people are already flying all over the world. Well, I know of alot Caucasians travelling around at ages even younger than me. I can make my own decisions now. I know I can, all the decisions actually lie with me whether I want to do it or not. It's just that 我过不了我自己这一关 to not listen to my mum. How old already still listen to her right? But I always feel that, she knows me best and know what is right or wrong for me. Sometimes I do things without thinking properly. Well at least this time round, I already decided on my decision, but just wanted to call her to assure me. And yes I am right. It is always proven true this way. There will only be one thing that even she don't allow, I will still go for it. That is, if I meet my Mr. Right. Really really correct guy. Frankly, I don't want to go through what she had gone through now. Alright, I shall not sidetrack. I have already wasted 3 hours of doing nothing. But I still need to get this off and done with.

Alot of friends ask me to just go! But I cannot say just go means go. I need to consider a few things first, money, time, studies. Alright I don't need to really be that dead serious about studies but still, I got to keep a minimum level right. I am not serious about studies here. Because most of the time I am dreaming away, distracted with my other things. My mum doesn't understand about the "concept" of exchange here. Perhaps she just want to play safe and make sure I am not doing the "wrong" things. Because she doesn't want me to skip lessons with the excuse of "going to travel". Well, I bet there will be chances of me doing this. At my own expense. I hope I won't be skipping too much, though I am paid to study. Still, she doesn't wish to waste that kind of hard earned money and time. A woman of principles. I wonder if this parenting concept will stay through the next century. She must be glad that I am a good daughter who listens to her.

Don't be sad for my missed trip! I am not sad. Though I really think I missed out a good deal. Because I am pretty sure I will come back to the States. So, I will not visit a second time to places.

I am pretty much indecisive and easily shakened person. I will work on it to become better!

I still think LV is pretty off our places. That's why I say it is a dilemma. Nevermind, at least I am going to Montreal and Quebec. Maybe I am feeling homesick too. Hmm... Well I feel much better because as days go on, I know exactly what I really want now.